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Joke of the Day

"What salesman has the slickest line? A hair grease salesman."

"I'm so poor I can't even pay for my own consequences."

"What do you call a fat magician? A 4-chin teller."

"Why shouldn't you get a Bachelors in Science? Because it's BS. Yea that was bullshit. Fine I'll cut it out.."

"What do you get when you have sex with an STD infested mentally challenged person? The slow clap"

"So this girl asked me what I look for in women I told her, ""3 holes and a heart beat"""

"What do laws and virgins have in common? They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)"

"*wife offers me a sip of her water* m: Am I gonna catch what you have? w: No m: w: m: Are you sur- w: You're not going to get my period!"

"What's the difference between a Greyhound station & a Crab with boobs? One's a crusty bus station... The other's a busty crustacean."

"Why don't you ever eat a girl out in the morning? Have you ever tried to pull apart a grilled cheese?"