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Joke of the Day

"Now that it's 2017, to be accepting, I no longer see gender or age.... especially after my trip to Thailand"

"Based on their level of excitement, bros in beer commercials seem unaware that you can pretty much buy beer anywhere."

"Sometimes, when I think about books I touch my shelf"

"I have a class about water (filtration systems, how to give everyone clean water, etc) and my teacher loves jokes. Anyone have some good water related jokes?"

"He told me I was too pretty not to smile. So I flipped him off, tackled him and shoved my middle finger up his nose. Now I'm smiling."

"Does anyone know how to take care of a Fern? Asking for a frond."

"Gasping for air while saying ""Oh. My. God."" as a waiter brings you dessert makes you look like a big fat fuck."

"I have two vices; smoking and masturbation. I'm a twenty a day man, and I smoke like a chimney."

"Soulmate sounds like something Satan puts in his coffee."

"Sometimes I feel driving over Beliebers, but then I'm like, ""what is wrong with me??"" because I just got my car washed."