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Joke of the Day
"So oxygen went on a second date with potassium That went OK2"
Next Joke
"Why do beta fish fight each other? Because they're trying to figure out who's the betta fish"
"Hearing problems I went to the doctors with hearing problems. He said ""Can u describe the symptoms?"" I said ""Homers a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"""
"""Well, that just isn't gay enough"" - the inventor of wrestling, shortly before adding spandex to the mix."
"A schooner, a clipper and a junk sail into a bar, All hands lost."
"Wife ""WHY ARE THERE MUDDY FOOTPRINTS ALL OVER THE HALL?"" [Me while trying to push a zebra up into the attic] Must be that damn dog again..."
"Isn't it so weird when you're thinking about someone and then they suddenly appear?... Anyway, my sister in law just caught me masturbating."
"I'm glad the pet stores close before the bar does. I could see drunken pet adoption being a real problem for me."
"You know you're watching Star Wars with Catholics when every time you hear ""May the Force be with you,"" you hear, ""And also with you."""
"A dyslexic walked into the bra"