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Joke of the Day

"Hearing problems I went to the doctors with hearing problems. He said ""Can u describe the symptoms?"" I said ""Homers a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"""

"Husbands. Can't live with 'em but have to take out the garbage and pay for everything without them."

"I'm on a new diet where I can only eat and drink things where I know what the ingredients mean. I can now tell you every ingredients use in Cheetos, how it's obtained, and the molecular structure."

"Marilyn Monroe died & was reincarnated into thousands of white girls who can't be handled at their worst, and aren't deserved at their best."

"What car does a japanese girl love to ride Nee-san"

"My favorite holiday drink is the Little Drummer Boy. It's one part rum, three parts pum."

"What did the frustrated cannibal say? Nothing he just threw up his hands."

"What does Harry Potter say when he walks into a bar? I Expectsum Patronum"

"What's the difference between acne and a catholic priest The acne waits till your thirteen to cum on your face..."

"[good cop] admit you stole those diamonds [suspect] wait but I peed on them so now they're mine [dog cop] Jim he has a point"