1822

Joke of the Day

"that awkward moment when you stub your toe and accidentally summon the spirits of a thousand dead feet while you yell and curse"

"Can someone throw Kevin Bacon in the freezing Artic waters and give him hypothermia? I NEED this six degrees of Kevin Bacon joke."

"The most difficult part about taking a personality test is deciding which personality should take it."

"Picture us, making love. Wrong. More cheese."

"I just got back from a boner contest I must admit, the competition was stiff."

"There are two types of people in this world Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data sets"

"Where do weirdos ride their bicycles? Psycho-paths. (as told by one of my coworkers)"

"Catch 22: I bought a protein shake but am not strong enough to twist the cap off."

"I got in touch with my inner self today. That's the last time I buy cheap toilet paper."

"""Yes I understand that's your face, but it's also the place where I need to put my butthole."" - Cats"