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Joke of the Day

"Thinking about becoming a cop just so I have an excuse for being out of shape, lazy and a racist."

"Whats the difference between a Mexican and a power tool? Power tools are found inside the Home Depot."

"Latey, my aphabet has been a the pace, I bame the fact there's ""noel"""

"You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts."

"God is like Justin Bieber. I have nothing against him personally, but his fan club is super annoying."

"What is the last thing that tickle-me elmo gets before he leaves the factory? Two test tickles"

"So, my mate Vincent cut his ear off and his wife asked him why? He just told her "" I guess I just had to 'let it Gogh'. EDIT: removed the u from gogh"

"What do you call a pirate's girlfriend? Pirate bae"

"Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant."

"My brother, Max, asked me to come up with a nickname for him. Now we just call him Maxx."