181955

Joke of the Day

"why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? to get to the bottom!"

"Are you alright? No. You're all....left"

"Why did the computer squeak? Someone stepped on the mouse."

"Why was Pavlov's hair so soft? Because classical conditioning!"

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me CRUCIO!"

"What is Donald trumps favorite street? Wall Street *badum tshhh*"

"My wife and I used to describe our marriage as 'forever', now we both prefer the term 'ad nauseam'."

"[on 1st date] Him: So why is someone as pretty as you single? Me: Single? Who's single? [gets right up in his face] We marry at dawn."

"My favourite element is helium. I can't speak highly enough of it."

"What do you call a really nice retard? A sweet potato"