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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? A: I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass. (I'm sorry, this joke was mentioned on How I Met Your Mother and I can't stop laughing since)"

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"What do you call a pimp without a cane? A caneless pimp."
"Why did the cannibal leave the restaurant? Because he got cold feet."
"This new thesaurus isn't just terrible, it's also terrible."
"A lot of people tell me that I'm funny... So I guess it's a good thing that looks aren't everything"
"There's no ""I"" in meat, but there's ""me"" and ""eat"", and I don't know how vegans can argue with that logic."
"What do you call a Spanish midget? A paragraph. Because he's not a full essay."
"Why did God have no sense of humor when putting the planets in order? because he didn't want to put Uranus at the end of the solar system"
"9/11 gave rise to ""Truthers"", Obama gave rise to ""Birthers"", so... ... would a movement to determine whether Hillary Clinton actually carries hot sauce in her purse be called ""Saucers""?"
"What kind of Asian dish takes away your freedoms? Kung Pao Chicken"