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Joke of the Day

"I'm sick and tired of all these goddamn illegal aliens taking jobs away from good, hard-working American aliens."

"How many kids with ADD does it take to change a lightbulb? WANNA RIDE BIKES???"

"[taking baby's shoes off & examining the soles] ""Oh look, completely clean. It's almost as if you were carried everywhere."""

"Once I did a presentation on George Washington & was asked when he died, but I never looked it up, so I said ""He's alive in all of us today"""

"What do boxes breathe? Boxygen"

"I came up with a new joke I invented a new word: Plagarism"

"18 years ago my 4rd grade teacher said to me ""You aren't shit and you'll never amount to anything.""... I guess it's safe to say, she was a psychic. Wonder if she can predict the lottery too."

"Knock Knock, ""Who's there?"" ""Gladiator"" ""Gladiator who?"" ""Gladiator, before going to the gang bang"""

"RACIST: im a racist! ME: uh oh RACIST: yea I race cars! ME: oh. I dont think u know what racist means RACIST: & I hate Jews! ME: there it is"

"What is the funniest two legged lizard? The stand-up chameleon."