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Joke of the Day

"Little on the nose that the Pope's riding around in a Fiat, isn't it? But then, I guess we know he's into that Fiat luxe."

"What do you call two guys above a window? Kurt and Rod"

"84% of Canadians think the preparations for the American blizzard are ""cute"""

"Why did the seal make a Tinder account? To find a Significant Otter."

"I'm scheduled for a vasectomy next Wednesday, but I am a little worried. I hear it can make a vas deferens in my sex life."

"For most, bikini season lasts a few short summer months, but I catch enough & store them so efficiently I can eat bikini all year round."

"Why does America spell some words differently? They said ""We can do it without u, Britain."""

"THERE ARE 7 BILLION PEOPLE IN THE WORLD. WHY WOULD YOU HAVE SEX WITH KITCHENWARE? Oh, that's not what pansexual means. Carry on then."

"A Russian boy asks his father... A Russian boy asks his father ""Daddy, can I have 5 ruble to buy milk, bread, and vodka?"" to which his father replies ""20 ruble?! What do you need 50 ruble for?!"""

"ME: So. You from around here? HER: Yes. You're in my bedroom closet."