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Joke of the Day

"I lost my college football scholarship in the very first game this weekend, for pulling a groin. Not mine, someone else's."

"Single by choice, just not my choice. Damn you, 19th amendment!"

"Why don't lesbians make good cooks? They're always eating out."

"What do you get when you cross a horse, an elephant, and a rhino? Helephino."

"I'm trying to write a poem for my girlfriend, does anyone know what rhymes with threesome?"

"How do you piss off an emo? Give them a dull razor."

"If You Have Never Seen A Galaxy Explode Just head to the nearest Samsung store."

"Went out to dinner last night & the hostess asked me ""Where would you like to sit?"" I replied ""preferably on a seat."" #accomplished"

"They say you get closer to God when you die.. because you stop existing"

"I took my boat out the other day and it made sounds as if it were sick. So I took it to the dock."