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Joke of the Day

"Internet, just because I bought shoes from you once doesn't mean I'm going to do it again. You're coming across as desperate."

"What do you call a dog with a great sense of humor? A Chihuahahaha."

"The girl on the stripper pole got mad because I gave her a monopoly dollar, well fake boobs, fake hair, fake nails gets fake dollars!"

"how do you keep a stupid, boorish, unnatractive, and uneducated person hanging?"

"My wife and I lost 150lbs combined! So if you see our twins wandering around please let us know!"

"What does it take to claim the world record for 'most blowjobs in one hour? You need to be able to blow a lot of guys in quick suck session. ^^^yeah ^^^I ^^^know ^^^it's ^^^lame"

"Why do girls have boobs? So you got something to look at while you're talking to them *Peter Griffin* hehehehe"

"Q: Did you hear about the incompetent lumberjack? A: He just couldn't cut it, so he was forest fired."

"Him: what does a polar bear weigh? Me: I don't know Him: enough to break the ice, my name's John. Me: so's mine."

"Going to show my kids before and after pictures of Lindsay Lohan and say this girl didn't think she needed a nap either."