201587

Joke of the Day

"Going to show my kids before and after pictures of Lindsay Lohan and say this girl didn't think she needed a nap either."

"What is hot, carbon-dated and buried deep inside Georgia? Her geography teacher's cock."

"I hate it when I see an inflatable arm-flailing tube man and then I realize that he was actually flailing his arms at someone behind me."

"Where's the middle of nowhere? It's three letters in. ""H""."

"Q: What is the difference between an UNDERWEAR & a STAGE CURTAIN? A: When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the UNDERWEAR..... it's SHOWTIME!!!"

"Okay to tell dead Steve Jobs jokes now? What's the difference between cancer and the middle class? At least cancer got Jobs."

"All these Marvel movies, and they sure are taking their time getting to Thanos and the Infinity Gauntlet Don't worry. They'll get there... Avengually."

"What sound does a train make when it's eating? Chew Chew"

"How did the redneck find the sheep in the tall grass? Satisfying."

"Did you hear the Offspring song about how to store mummies? ""You gotta keep 'em desiccated"""