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Joke of the Day

"A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.''"

"If there was a competition for saggy tits, my wife would beat everyone. In fact, she'd wipe the floor with them."

"What's with these people on facebook who never particpate on your page at all, yet act all weird when you decline attending their stupid event?"

"Hey girl... Hey girl I have a saving account and a dick. One is really big and one is really small but either way you will be satisfied"

"What's big and hairy and goes 'beep beep'? A monster in a traffic jam."

"What do you call a pair of twins who live together? ""Womb-mates"""

"Home buying tips: -Up & coming area = Murders -Good for young professional = Cheap bc of murders -Open layout = See murders from the kitchen"

"Why did Michael Jackson go to Macy's? He heard boys' pants were half off."

"I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it."

"85 year old Viagra user takes a tumble I've fallen and I can't get up"