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Joke of the Day

"One time my dad caught me doing homework and made me eat an entire pack of calculators"

"hey you got a sec? next time someone asks you if you got a sec, you must simply reply"" no i have lots of secs"""

"During Peter Andre's early acting career he decided to get rid of the X at the end of his name... He was only getting shit rolls."

"My mate was devasted when a stunning Syrian lady stopped messaging him on a dating site . I told him don't worry there's plenty more refugee's in the sea"

"I don't understand bow ties. What, is your neck a gift?"

"Heard this one from my trumpet playing band director Does anyone know the Trumpeteer handshake? ""Hi, I'm better than you"""

"What did the dog get at the vet? [FIXED]"

"I ask my friend in North Korea how he likes it there His exact words were... ""I can't complain"" Must not be all that bad there."

"Have you heard about the cannibal that passed his brother in the woods... ...?"

"A man walks into a bar and says OUCH!"