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Joke of the Day
"How did Adolf tie his shoes? With two knotzies."
Next Joke
"Let me be clear, I don't want to die alone. However I want to be left completely alone until that moment."
"If Pluto isn't a planet because it's too small... then do you really have a penis?"
"I'm wearing nike pants so you have to just do it..."
"My wife was so sick this morning that I had to carry her to the kitchen to make my breakfast."
"Did you hear about the new cemetery? People are dying to get in."
"Breaking News - in Hong Kong, a ship carrying red paint collided with a ship carrying purple paint CNN reports that both crews are marooned"
"Someone just told me that they hate bacon... I can't even find words... It's like someone just murdered a rainbow."
"Assorted nuts... ...was the name of the insane asylum."
"*knocks over the 17 Starbucks cups on her nightstand *answers her alarm clock, ""hello?"""