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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between my girlfriend and a washing machine? After I dump my load in a washing machine it doesn't follow me around."

"How do you write an essay that blows people away? With lots of drafts"

"How do you tell if a girl is ticklish? You give her a test-tickle."

"My wife never catches me scoping out the hot chick because she's too busy judging the hot chick."

"Q: Why couldn't Tommy ride a bicycle? A: Because he was a gold fish."

"Someone put six uneaten pastries in the trash because Satan has many forms."

"Beneath that furry exterior your cat has at least 6 neck tattoos."

"Someone left a flyer on my windshield asking me to envision heaven, so I pictured a world where no one leaves flyers on my windshield."

"What does the Indian chef do in his spare time? It's naan of your business!!!"

"why is it so hard just to get your kids to say ""bitch please"" and ""bitch thank you"""