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Joke of the Day

"Someone put six uneaten pastries in the trash because Satan has many forms."

"What did the cat use to sharpen its claws? Me. Ow."

"My friend decided to get a tattoo of Pi on his face. It was an irrational decision."

"The lights at JayZ's house weren't working, so he called me to fix it. Now he's got 99 problems but the switch ain't one."

"How do you make the best Americanized Chinese food? Like Tso."

"I heard the best time travel joke tomorrow."

"What do you call The Bear who loves philosophy? winnie the Philosopooh"

"Mom told me to quit calling the postman a mail escort."

"Girl on Facebook Heyy i have not seen u since high school. Me. It's been a while. Her. Yea been married 6 years now : ) Me. Unfriend"

"""one Man's trash is other man's treasure"" Isn't the best way to tell your kid that he is adopted. Credits- /u/theone1221"