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Joke of the Day

"Those kids in Sudan would complain a lot less if they knew I struggled every day with having old people hands."

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"What's the difference between a thief and a peeping Tom? Well, a thief snatches watches..."
"Besides watermelon, there should be windmelon, firemelon and earthmelon. The four elemelons."
"I'll admit that my jokes are cheesy, but even then the ones I find hilarious my friends don't find funny at all They must be laughtose intolerant"
"Your mum is so fat that when she entered an ugly contest they said, ""sorry mam, but no professionals."""
"Why do they even bother having different brands of milk?"
"If you don't call your spouse ""wonderful"" when you're on a game show, you're legally required to get a divorce at the end of the show."
"If Gingrich were to win the presidency... ...can we call his current wife the ""third lady?"""
"What's the difference between a tire and 365 condoms? One is a good year, the other is a great year."
"My dog used to chase after people on a bike so I took the bike away from him."
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