178115
Joke of the Day
"I saw something yesterday that reminded me of you. I almost stepped in it."
Next Joke
"Told my wife I wanted our kids every other weekend and she reminded me that we're married & live together so I'd have to see them every day."
"*says grace before snorting a fat rail of cocaine*"
"Mattel is launching a new Twitter Barbie. She looks like a stunning hot blonde on the package but is an old fat guy when you open the box"
"I wanted to gift my brother a drum set... ...but I decided to keep it for myself. **badum tss**"
"What do you call Keanu Reeves when he served under Hitler? A Neo Nazi."
"he's my french step dad... i call him my faux pa."
"If every house in Mexico isn't perfectly landscaped and each bed isn't impeccably made then what in the fuck?!"
"What type of pants does Mario wear? denim denim denim"
"[Drug deal] How do I know you're not a cop -If I was a cop would I do this? *Starts breakdancing* Thats not as much proof as you think it is"