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Joke of the Day

"You know what's the only difference between Martin Luther King day and St. Patrick's day? Everybody wants to be Irish on St. Patrick's day."

"My friend David had his Id stolen. Now we just call him Dav.."

"Whats the difference between a hispanic and a book. The book has papers."

"You can't choose your family but you can choose a hitman."

"I don't sign anything without pretending to read it first."

"How did the frog die? He kermitted suicide. I'm sorry"

"Boy, if I had a nickel for every time I paid for a $0.95 corndog with a dollar!"

"can a women make you a millionaire? yes,if you are a billionaire!"

"I used to go out with a girl who was obsessed with graphs... she was always plotting behind my back"

"Why do midgets laugh when they run in fields? Because the grass tickles their balls"