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Joke of the Day

"I've been playing poker on Facebook. So far I've poked 113 women, but not a one of them have poked me back."

"I bet girls on facebook with the duck faces look for men that make a lot of bread."

"Is there anything better than being fit and healthy? Yes. Pizza and beer."

"Why don't astronauts take anything seriously? They don't grasp the gravity of the situation..."

"Boss: I suspect one of you is dead [Everyone looks at me, except for Paul, who is not moving at all]"

"What's worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than that? TWO worms in your apple!"

"What is a toad's favorite genre of music? Hip hop."

"What are people in motels doing that they need such a steady and reliable source of ice?"

"I thought VH1 was showing an episode of The Golden Girls, but turns out it was an interview with Steven Tyler, David Bowie & Keith Richards."

"What kind of dog can do magic tricks? A labracadabrador."