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Joke of the Day

"Never look down on anyone. Unless you're a lion cub named Simba and you're being held over a crowd of animals by a weird monkey doctor."

"I almost had a heart attack when I saw a black man carrying a TV like mine. Then I remembered mine was at home working in the garden."

"What's the difference between the G-Spot and Jack Daniels? I'll actually look for the Jack Daniels."

"Why is Halloween considered the scariest time of the year? Most weddings happen in June."

"Yes I have exams. No, I'm not easily distracted. Yes, my shadow is interesting."

"How can you tell an engineer is an extrovert? He looks at your shoes when he talks to you."

"*hires skywriter Will you take me back if I stop wasting our money on frivolous things?"

"I wasn't so sure about having a mustache... ...but it's growing on me."

"What happens if Donald Trump pulls out of the election? He will be Donald Duck"

"Why don't blind people go skydiving? Because it scares the crap out of their dogs."