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Joke of the Day

"Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make... Then they call me ugly and poor."

"Customer Service Person: is there anything else I can help you with today? Me: Is this a date? It feels like a date now."

"what idiot named it erectile dysfunction instead of ballzheimer's"

"me: trump is a thin skinned psychopath who will destroy the world at the slightest provocation also me: let's make him mad lol"

"Funniest Joke Ever. Nevermind, it actually isn't that funny. Ok well... A bear and a rabbit... No no... It's not that funny. Nevermind."

"Guys joking about chemical weapons isn't funny. Syriasly."

"Just went to the bookies to put a bet on a horse called ""Dirty Carpet"" it's never been beaten"

"At first I was shocked by how graphic the sex scenes in Rise of the Planet of the Apes was.... Then I realized I was watching Interracial Gangbangs part 7"

"but sir, if a picture is worth a thousamd words then i dont understamd why my essay cant just be 4 or 5 emojis"

"Watching movies with kids: If he/she hasn't seen it, eons and billions of questions. If he/she has seen it, eons and billions of spoilers."