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Joke of the Day

"What do you call someone who only tells knock-knock jokes? A Jehovah's Witness."

"Why'd the pervert cross the road? He couldn't pull out of the chicken"

"I'd date me. But mainly because I put out."

"My hair is 100% organic, but it has been tested on animals. Portions may have been used to drape over cats' heads to make little wigs."

"I never thought they would make another Jurassic Park... ...But sequels, uh, find a way."

"How do you get a stranger to hop onto a bandwagon? You poke 'em on."

"I saved 100 orphans from a burning building. Do they call me ""The Orphan Saver?"" No. I butchered 20 men with my bare hands in WWI, but so they call me ""The Butcher?"" No. But you fuck one goat...."

"What kind of fun does a priest have? None."

"Sex so good, you get out of bed to see which neighbor is having it."

"I'm calculating how much it would cost to install lights for a little league baseball field A ballpark estimate would be perfect"