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Joke of the Day

"Him: I'm tolerant of the gay lifestyle. A neighbor of mine was gay. Me: Thanks. I'm tolerant of yours too. A neighbor of mine was an idiot."

"It takes a real man to be a juggler You've got to have balls to do it"

"They say one friend out of every group has the potential to be a serial killer So I pushed Steve off a cliff, just in case it was him."

"He pasta way? Here today, gone tomato. You cannoli do so much before thyme is up. Never sausage a tragedy. Olive my thoughts are with you."

"How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Juan."

"Helping a friend So I got a text from my friend this morning telling me he was going to kill himself. Do I reply? Or just leave him hanging."

"i am not jesus Jesus can wallk on water..,, correct? Yess! Well,.. I can walk on cucumbers. As you may know, cucumbers are 98% water. So I am 98% Jesus. ;)"

"What is all this #Brexit going around? When did Bromine decide to leave the periodic table?"

"I like my women like I I like my coffee.. Ground up and in the freezer."

"So a photon checks into a hotel... Bellman says ""Sir may I take your bags?"" Photon replies ""Nah... I'm traveling light"""