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Joke of the Day

"Thinking about getting married? My wife got mad at me for doing all the yard work because we are in a fitbit step challenge together."

"What do you call hiring German engineers to work on your overseas project? Krautsourcing"

"What do you get when you play country music backwards? You get your job back, you get your wife back and you get your tractor back."

"Every year, falling coconuts kill more people than shark attacks, but the families of the shark victims are less embarrassed."

"Swimming ""Hey, is that ur Kid in the swimming pool?"" 'No, my kid can't swim'"

"It's all fun and games until someone from real life recognizes you and you realize you're too small to drag off the body."

"""Balls!"" Said the queen. ""If I had two I'd be the king!"""

"Abortion jokes are never funny. So if you accidentally start forming one, you should terminate it before it comes to fruition."

"This year's most overused TV line: ""It's complicated."" It means absolutely nothing."

"Hi, I'm your son's teacher, Ms. Frizzle. Funny story, your kid is dead and inside a tortoise"