174979

Joke of the Day

"When my husband brags that girls hit on him at work, I just remind him that I make more money than him. We both go to bed happy."

"Got kicked out of Barnes and Noble for moving the ""Caution Wet Floor"" sign to the Fifty Shades of Gray aisle."

"I went to donate a kidney once.. I went in to donate a kidney once but when I arrived at the hospital they asked me where I'd got it from -Jimmy Carr"

"Doctor: You need a kidney transplant. Me: A transplant? Dr: Don't worry, I've never lost a patient. I know where each one is buried. Me:"

"A horse walks into a bar And the bar tender says ""why the long face?"" The horse replies ""my wife just died of cancer."""

"""Heres your social security card, you need it forever! Its made of paper, don't laminate it. Good luck."" -The Government"

"Why didn't Sug Knight talk to the police? Because the g is silent"

"Why did the students need a ladder to get into school? It was a high school."

"Rocket Ship Did you hear about the rocket ship that didn't go up to space? It had projectile dysfunction"

"God took a paternity test He found out he was the father, the son and the holy spirit."