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Joke of the Day

"*pushes math homework away in 1990* I'll never need this *getting yelled at by subway customer in 2014* I WANT THE BREAD CUT LIKE A RHOMBUS"

"How can you tell if someone has Alzheimer's? A. How can you tell if someone has Alzheimers?"

"Knock knock Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave breaking down into an emotional wreck and mess of tears at the realisation that the Alzheimer's has finally taken hold."

"Yo mama is so stupid she sold her car for gas money."

"What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot, you racists."

"Wanna hear a dirty joke? Mike rolled around in the mud. Wanna hear a clean joke? Mike took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a sexy joke? Bubbles is the girl next door."

"What did the car dealer ask the oscilloscope? sin or cosine?"

"Do you know what indefinitely means? Well, if you're nuts are slapping against her ass, then you're in........ definitely"

"Is a picture of Elijah Wood called a frodograph? (It makes more sense when you say it out loud)"

"How much does a pirate pay for corn? Buccaneer."