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Joke of the Day
"How does an Alzheimer's patient celebrate New Years? Kissing strangers."
Next Joke
"Gonna open a karaoke place where each song is 90 seconds max. Most are 25 seconds. Just the chorus one time, then onto the next song."
"I'm beginning to suspect I might have bad posture call it a hunch"
"Where does geography and geography meet? The Bermuda Triangle."
"A man got knocked out the other day... I said to him ""dont worry, I called you an ambulance while you where knocked out"" *points* you're an ambulance! You're an ambulance! You're an ambulance!"
"Today, a hobo called me a beautiful princess, but he pronounced it ""I KNOW YOU HAVE CHANGE, YOU STUPID CRACKER BITCH!""."
"I sat next to a hot girl on bus and thought: Please don't get an erection. Please don't get an erection. ... ... But she did. :<"
"What has two legs and looks like a spider? A spider. (They have two legs and an additional six legs also)"
"I'm pitching a prison dating show called 'America's Next Top Bottom'"
"I lost my mood ring... And I'm not sure how I should feel about it."