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Joke of the Day
"What does a math teacher say when they leave? calc-U-LATER"
Next Joke
"Friends: ""I need a new profile picture."" Me: ""I need a new face."""
"America is that sexy classmate everyone had a crush on in high school, not aging that well but you'd still hit it."
"[at a bar] me: hey girl are u a wanted criminal girl: no me: oh ok [to a group of cops] shes not here, search the other building"
"Where do Squarells live? In Geometrees. I am not embarrassed to say I made this up two weeks ago while teaching quadrilaterals. The groan from my students could be heard for miles."
"What do you call it when a jaeger licks your butthole? Pacific Rim Job."
"What did the devil get arrested for? Possession!"
"I'm not as tweet as you drunk I am think."
"I just saw this advert and the lady said allergies cause you to avoid the things you love. That explains why I never get laid."
"Recent study shows that masturbating twice weekly increases life expectancy by 20%. I've done the maths. I am immortal."