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Joke of the Day

"""yo Adam, Eve, don't eat from that tree ok?"" ""Why God?"" ""CUZ I INSTALLED THIS SWEET BURGER KING BRO"" ""AW HELL YEAH"" *God & Adam chest bump*"

"Has your mom ever caught you masturbating in the closet? Great hiding spot, isn't it?"

"IKEA made headlines today... ...due to their new range of corduroy pillowcases"

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black"

"My sister is a Cancer... ironic how she died... Killed by a giant crab."

"My wife has the body of a porn star... ..which is kind of creepy and takes up a lot of room in the fridge."

"[on phone with attorney] HIM: you're being charged for murder. ME: damn that sounds expensive i guess you can just put it on my Amex"

"Good thing is that the Irish won't be leaving EU. Although, U2 would probably still sound as good With or Without EU."

"I met a sick bird yesterday that got deported. The cops kept yelling about him being an ""ill-eagle""."

"My friend told me that i don't understand irony... Which was ironic, because we were at a bus stop at the time."