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Joke of the Day

"Just found out my friend's wife is pregnant They say they don't know the sex, but I am fairly certain it wasn't anal"

"How many /r/ users does it take to change a lightbulb? Three. One to do it, one to complain that it has already been done before, and one to repost this joke."

"Did you hear a macaroni penguin is running against Trump? He's leading in the poles."

"You have to be careful when telling rape jokes... You never know who got buthurt"

"I'm going to go against the Circlejerk here and say that I am really starting to like Mayweather It's really starting to Warmup, without getting Overlyhot as it does during Midsummer."

"Mom, is this skirt too short? Yes. Your balls are showing, Robert."

"I'm white, but not like ""has a golden retriever named Chance"" white."

"[First day at New Job] New Boss: When in Rome do as the Romans you know? <Slaughters entire office and imposes grain taxes on peasantry>"

"Australians don't have sex. ... Australians mate"

"iPhone's from the future. 2016: iPhone 7=no headphone jack 2017: iPhone 8=no battery 2018: iPhone 9=no screen 2019: iPhone 10=no phone at all, just pay Apple $1000"