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Joke of the Day
"16 sodium atoms walks into a bar.... followed by Batman."
Next Joke
 
"The first time your mom saw me naked She asked for an epidural"
"Can February march? April may."
"When I think about you, I touch myself..... ......I rub my temples because you give me a goddamn headache..."
"WHO THE FUCK TOOK MY... oh there it is."
"If an Astronaut Vomits in L.E.O. If an Astronaut vomits in L.E.O., what do you call the portion of the vomit closest to the Earth? The Ralph Nadir"
"My wife and I decided that we don't want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring one."
"Bae: Come over. Romeo: Can't. You're a Capulet, I'm a Montague. Bae: Deny thy father and refuse thy name; come over. Romeo: Also, you're 13."
"For a guy who's obsessed with public safety, I think Batman drives a little too fast sometimes."
"What's the Only Planet That Gives a Crap? Uranus."