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Joke of the Day
"If time means money... ...then an ATM is **A** **T**ime **M**achine."
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"Do lady beavers call their vaginas a ""me""? No. Because they're ladies."
"If storks bring human babies what bring monster babies? Cranes."
"I'll die fat, drunk & happy while you live healthy until you get run over by a bus... See ya at the cemetery!"
"Hell is having a married couple tell you a story at the same time."
"What do you call a bunch of black children playing in a pile of leaves? raisin bran"
"When your kids are little you're a super hero.When they're teens you're a super villain. After that, your only power is invisibility."
"Why did the depressed chicken cross the road? To get to the other side :("
"Who came after Augustus? Septembrus"
"Who takes over when the Ultrasound man is on leave? The Hip Replacement Guy."