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Joke of the Day
"The doctor gave me 1 month to live So I shot him. The judge gave me 20 years. Problem solved."
Next Joke
"People keep accusing me of collecting periodicals... They never specify which magazine my issues are from, they just tell me that I have them."
"A pianist is currently on trial. He was accused of fingering A Minor."
"When you say ""9 out of 10 forest fires are caused by humans"" all I hear is ""there's a bear out there who knows how to use matches."""
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bat ! Bat who ? Bat you'll never guess!"
"After watching ""Breaking Bad"" and the VMAs in the same night, I think I'd rather my kid be a meth dealer than a musician."
"Soviet KGB Joke Group of people sit around telling political anecotes, one person says: ok guys please slow down ... why? ... my hand is tired from writing down names ..."
"How did the desk lamp store manager feel when thieves stole all his lightbulbs? He was delighted."
"What's the difference between a feminist and a gun? a gun only has one trigger"
"Wife: ""Hey sexy, the kids are asleep, I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear."" Me: ""OK, ... the bathroom....the kitchen....your car..."""