172998
Joke of the Day
"Why does Dracula have no friends? Because he's a pain in the neck."
Next Joke
"Why I don't like people: 1% logical reasons. 99% just because."
"What's the difference between a bad sharpshooter and a constipated owl? One shoots, but can't hit. The other hoots, but can't shit."
"That shitty moment when you finally get comfy in bed then realize the lights are on."
"Did you notice the difference between Trump's inauguration and Obama's? Trump's crowd paled in comparison."
"What do you call a guy who always phones people? Colin."
"Decided to take all my old watches and join them together to make a new belt... turned out to be a waist of time."
"""I'll Knock You Into Next Week"" have black mothers invented time travel? Details at 11. #ABCReports"
"I love how you can tell how slutty a girl is by the size of her hoop earrings."
"Its all shits and giggles. Until someone giggles and shits."