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Joke of the Day

"Which vampire ate the three bears' porridge? Ghouldilocks."

"Why do adults like Legos so much, when they grow old? They can't lego of their childhood. Tell some more Lego puns, here!"

"One time I got drunk and took the bus... Now that may not sound impressive to you, but I've never driven a bus before."

"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Because my tires look like donuts? Cop: Get out"

"Woman walks around claiming to be a flute. Says that you can blow in her hole and press her buttons for $50!"

"If this isn't funny, I won't be able to live with myself I'll have to get another apartment."

"I have a stepladder. I never knew my real ladder."

"What do you give a sick microbe? Primordial soup"

"What monsters are all the tools in the toolbox afraid of? Vampliers"

"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Cindrella?"