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Joke of the Day

"A girl phoned me the other day and said ""Come on over, there's nobody home."" I went over. Nobody was home"

"Do you want to join my pistol club? We drink till noon and piss till two."

"You know what I'd say to the victims of the Russia-Ukraine conflict? Crimea River"

"I just pictured my life.....and there isn't room for you in the frame."

"If you ain't Muslim... ....you ain't Shiite"

"Good woman joke What do you tell a woman with two black eyes. Nothing you already told her twice."

"What do you call a Muslim who is notoriously late for everything? 9/12"

"Had some mushrooms this morning. Breakfast of Champignons."

"I can't wait to jump on my kids' beds at 5am on Mother's Day, and holler ""WHAT DID YOU GET ME?!?"""

"What did 0 say to 8? hey, nice belt!"