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Joke of the Day

"who says homosexuality isn't a decision? i turn women gay all the time."

"The UK is horrified by even the slightest glaze of snowy weather. I ordered a bowl of Frosted Flakes this morning and they closed the roads."

"What do you call Triple H practicing for a WWE match? Preparation H"

"When I'm old, I'm gonna giggle uncontrollably, squirm, and go all sack of potatoes on my son when he tries to get me in the car as payback."

"My impression of a New Zealand duck: Quick... Quick. Quick."

"Hey, I have an idea. Instead of complaining about your auto-correct every day, how about going into your settings & turning it the fcuk off?"

"Why do cows have bells? Because their horns don't work!"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house. (awkward silence) knock knock. (who's there?) The chicken. Feel free to try on your friends, its a good laugh."

"How do you know a joke isn't a repost? When it doesn't reach the front page."

"Me: yeah was bingo the name of the dog or the farmer Professor: i meant questions about the exa- holy shit"