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Joke of the Day

"What does a 60 year old woman have between her breasts that a 20 year old woman doesn't? Her belly button."

"Health tip: There's never a 'safe' time to shake a teenage boy's hand. Never."

"What's the expiry date on plastic? [81](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/UYwYdFdoecA/0.jpg)"

"New machine at the gym There is a new machine at the gym. It's truly awesome! I almost puked after an hour, it really has it all. Cookies, chocolate bars, chips, sodas."

"At first I didn't like having a beard, but it grew on me."

"I organized a threesome for (NAME)'s last night of freedom. There were a couple of no-shows, but he still had fun."

"My neighbor's kids said they loved sneakers. They're huge Vans of them."

"I have a splitting headache today. Voldemort must be back from the dead and attempting to kill me."

"I'm trying to not be horny all the time but it's hard"

"What do crocodiles serve at dinner time? Death rolls"