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Joke of the Day
"Where do alcoholics get their breakfast pastries? Drunken Donuts"
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"R.I.P. 2013 (2013-2013)"
"Paris Hilton's IMDB page should only be accessible on April 1st."
"I don't know, Your Honor. Last thing I remember was the Polaroid picture crying and I was shaking it like a baby andIT WOULDN'T STOP CRYING!"
"Some vampires went to see Dracula. They said ""Drac we want to open a zoo. Have you got any advice?"" ""Yes"" replied Dracula ""have lots of giraffes."""
"What's the definition of a tree? Something that stands still for forty years then suddenly jumps out in front of a woman driver."
"I rate the pyramids 9/11 Because the jews did it."
"Why couldn't you hear the pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the pterodactyl is extinct."
"Apparently, if a bear attacks, you are supposed to play dead. You know, that sounds an awful lot like something a bear would say..."
"I tried taking Viagara the other day... I must not have swallowed it fast enough, because man oh man was my neck stiff!"