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Joke of the Day

"What has 2 eyes, 2 belly buttons and 2 legs? 2 pirates."

"What's the difference between ignorance and arrogance? I don't know, and I don't care."

"My dad said, always leave them wanting more. Ironically, that's how he lost his job in disaster relief."

"First Caribou: What do you call a bee that can't make up his mind? Second Caribou: A maybee."

"Ghosts never write encouraging stuff on my mirror. It's always ""KILL"" or ""MURDER"" or ""YOU'RE OUT OF NUTELLA"""

"im near a club thats popular with college kids and a white girl in a wu-tang shirt just yelled ""PBR! WOOOO!"""

"My wife just accused me of being big-headed and thinking I was better than I was. I nearly fell off my throne."

"Butterflies have 1,200 eyes. That means they spend 7 months taking out their contacts every night."

"Somehow stumbled upon a nude beach. . Yeah, found myself in the middle of no wear."

"Two guys playing poker. One guy not doing anything. Why? He was cardboard."