171278

Joke of the Day

"A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender says, ""You're quite a celebrity around here. We've even got a drink named after you."" The grasshopper says, ""You've got a drink named Steve?"""

"What did the gay man say at the bar? ""Hey, can I push in your stool?"""

"Why was the Dalai Lama not upset after he spilled spaghetti sauce? Because it happened in the *past*a."

"What has a million and one legs but still can't walk? Jerry's kids."

"If you eat the prize from a cereal box.. does that make you a specially marked box? source: soos says some words"

"A Reddit mod deleting their account during controversy and creating a new one is like... the Reddit CEO"

"What does a robot do during sex? He nuts and bolts!"

"""Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."""

"What's the difference between an Afghani Military Base and a Pakistani Elementary School? I don't know, I just fly the drone."

"A magician is driving down a road... and turns into a driveway."