1710

Joke of the Day

"Never understand when someone says, ""cats are snobby."" Like dogs are constantly inviting you & the kids over for burgers & a swim?"

"Which stretches further, skin or rubber? Skin. It says in the bible, Moses tied his ass to a tree and walked 10 miles."

"Expeditions to Mars Russian expedition: ""Well, there is Mars."" American expedition: ""Well, there are the life forms. Disgusting"" Chinese expedition: ""Not if you know how to cook them properly"""

"How does Lord Voldemort like his pussy? (whisper) HHAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY"

"A new rehab center for pill addicts is open Its called Oxy Clean"

"I'm going to open a frozen pizza shop It's called ""Pizza By the Ice."""

"David Hasselhoff saves money on tailored shirts by not ordering the first 5 buttons."

"What did one elf girl say to the other elf girl who wasn't sharing? ""Stop being so elfish, Karen!"""

"why did the chicken cross the road it didn't."

"What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? A northern fairytale begins ""Once upon a time ..."" A southern fairytale begins ""Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit ..."""