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Joke of the Day

"My wife and I used to describe our marriage as 'forever', now we both prefer the term 'ad nauseam'."

"Why hasn't anyone invented alcohol that acts as birth control too?"

"I asked the manager if I could sample the sausage and that's when I was asked to leave Costco. THE SAUSAGE Not YOUR sausage"

"Why would Gabe Newell be a better world leader than Hitler? There'd be no World War 3."

"Why are bananas never lonely? Because they hang around in bunches."

"Anyone have any jokes about Rats? Need some good ones!"

"Longest joke in the world (source) http://longestjokeintheworld.com"

"Have you ever thought about the word racecar and how it's a palindrome? Put it backwards and it spells racecar, put it sideways and it kills Paul Walker."

"What's the fat person's favourite football club? KFC."

"How can you tell who is the head nurse of a facility? She's the one with dirty knees."