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Joke of the Day

"driverless cars???? I don't trust autocorrect to pick the correct word let alone let a car just drive me .... by itself"

"A girl asks her boyfriend if she's put on weight recently. He says ""no!"" and then has a seizure. He goes to the doctor. Diagnostic: convulsive liar."

"My neighbor My aboriginal neighbour was telling me he got his kids a trampoline and a couple of bikes off the Internet for Christmas, I asked him which site he used, and he replied google earth"

"So I woke up to a blowjob this morning... That's the last time I fall asleep with my mouth open"

"Threesome? No thanks If I wanted to disappoint two people in the same room, I would have dinner with my parents."

"What did the mathematician say to the lumberjack drummer? I really like your logger rhythm!"

"How can you tell if you have a high sperm count? If she has to chew before she swallows."

"Lion and a cheetah have a race and the cheetah wins! The lion say ""your such a cheeta!!"" The cheetah says ""um no your lion!!"""

"When is April 2nd and she is still pregnant! D:"

"Christmas Jokes (I know it's a bit late) Why is Santa so jolly? Because he knows where all the naught girls live! What's the difference between snowmen and snow women? Snow balls"