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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend says she needs time and distance Is she calculating velocity?"
Next Joke
"What's tall, handsome and muscular? Not you!"
"Honesty is the best policy, unless you're trying to return something that you've already worn."
"What does a toilet, a clitoris, and an anniversary have in common? Men usually miss all three."
"Her: Let's read your horoscope... Do you believe in astrology? Me: No. That's such a scam. Well, at least that's what my psychic says."
"I drink twice a year.... When it's my birthday, and when it isn't"
"Great... This guy double parked his porsche, and now I've got paint all in my keys."
"What is Donald Trump's favorite Christmas song? White Christmas."
"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot... The bartender says, ""Wow! That is really cool! Where did you get it?"" ""Africa"", says the parrot."
"What did the kangaroo say when her baby was missing? Help! My pocket's been picked!"