170262

Joke of the Day

"I asked my dad if he liked his haircut... He said he didn't at first but it's growing on him."

"If you find that China is not working... ... Have you tried updating your Mao settings?"

"A turkey was about to cross the road... when a chicken appeared and said ""dont do that that, you will never hear the end of it"""

"Got fast food so many times this week that when mcd's asked me to pull out front to wait for my order, I was expecting an intervention."

"Why did the terrorist cross the road? To send people to the other side."

"Underage girl, sucking on daddy's cock, gets jizzed on all over he......... Oh I'm sorry, I thought this was a google image search."

"After Oprah lost all that weight....... .....she was just a Phantom of the Oprah!"

"Roses... Roses are red violets are blue - I'm a schizophrenic and so am I."

"What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph... He isn't a full essay"

"First date Him: What do you do? Me [pulls out a Victoria's Secret catalog that I've clearly glued photos of my face into] ""I'm a model."""