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Joke of the Day

"I'm thinking about buying a greyhound, don't know what the wife is going to say so I'll run it by her first."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your place! Knock knock Who's there? Bak bak My chemistry prof said that one today"

"Two atoms walking down the street ... ... one turns to the other and says ""I think I've lost an electron"". The other replies ""F*ck me, a talking atom!"""

"I just burned my Hawaiian pizza in the oven I guess I should have put it on aloha setting"

"Have you heard the tagline for the new Ghostbusters movie? Now with 400% more bust!"

"Why do so few people become botanists? Because of the stigma."

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly someone into a wood chipper."

"I lost my virginity to a retard last night... I wanted my first time to be special."

"It's greats having your doctor say you're narcissistic. It's like being compared to the stuff of legends."

"Monogamy is having one spouse. Polygamy is having more than one spouse. Monopolygamy is marrying the Monopoly Guy."